This Poptaters Sonic the Hedgehog Figure Is Proof That Life Is Meaningless

If you’ve ever wondered whether or not we, as a species, deserve to exist, well, here’s your answer:

We don’t.

And this is why:

This Sonic the Hedgehog figure from Poptaters is an abomination. It defies logic and laughs in the face of reason. It represents all that is unholy, and it’s a good enough excuse for everyone to sink into existential crisis mode.

Why does this thing exist? Simple: To prove that we shouldn’t.

But hey, at least it’s affordable! You’ll be able to pick up this horrid collectible — that’s right, collectible — for just $14.99 when it spawns in March 2023 through Entertainment Earth. Mint condition is guaranteed so, you know, this ungodly product of the depraved mind will be in pristine shape when it arrives.

It’s worth noting that the image above does state “new for 2022,” which was last year. But the listing for this item shows a release for next month.

Not since the KFC Xbox Series X|S controller has there been this much evidence that human life truly has no meaning.